Monday, February 25, 2008

Bourne 4...

Universal announced plans to make a new Bourne movie with Damon and director Paul Greengrass agreeing to do it.


I loved the first one. I liked the second one. If you read my blog, you know how much I hated the third. I ranked it the worst movie of the year last year. It is one of the worst "action" movies I have ever seen. Not to rehash old feelings, but how can you call it an "action" movie when there is only 10 minutes of super shitty - "I'm going to use a handheld camera to make it look fast and cool even though it's not"- action. It's bull shit. Bull. Shit. So then what is it? Is it the plot? Oh, you mean the same exact plot from the first two? That can't possibly be it. It's not even entertaining. It's a waste of money. And time. And talent.

I used to love the shit out of Damon. But after the third Bourne and his questionable comments about Bond (he said it was a weak franchise and that Ultimatum was better than Casino Royale) I have started to question him as a human being. I mean WTF? Seriously? You think your shitty movie can even hold a candle to Casino Royale? Get the eff out of my face. I'll kill you. Why don't you go make another shitty Ocean's movie so you can waste more of your talent.

I do love Matt Damon. But it's hard to stomach these shitty movies he does and I'm bitter about it. If this movie does happen and you (yes, you dedicated Ibodera reader) see it, I won't be your friend anymore. I'll call you names and tell people you have the clap.

I'm out.



Lighter than Muki, but darker than Kris said...

1. Ultimatum was a good movie. I'm not going to call it amazing, but it was good.
2. Casino Royale - not that fresh, homey. Seriously mediocre (not including that first scene where he chases down that misc African).
3. For the record I would def watch Ultimatum over Casino Royale.
4. The Bond franchise is silly. Pierce Brosnan even said that Jason Bourne's ish is tighter cuz he doesnt have toys to help him defeat the bad guys.
5. Don't be telling people I have the clap.

M. Viggy said...

I've already pre-ordered my tickets for what is being billed as the "Swami Spite Fest"

Brown Guy said...

I apologize for not being original, but Casino Royal sucks, dude. The entire extended poker scene was garbage. And honestly, Bourne would whoop Bond's ass in straight up fisticuffs. That's the true measure of hardness.

You are incredibly misdirected here. It's akin to your love of "Superman Returns."

Cut it out.